Simple joys of maidenhood

I saw Camelot on Saturday night (at Union Colony Dinner Theater including an awesome performance by my brother). It must've been the first time I listened to the lyrics of "The Simple Joys of Maidenhood", and wow, are they blood thirsty!! For example, take the last verse:

Are those sweet, gentle pleasures gone for good?
Shall a feud not begin for me?
Shall kith not kill their kin for me?
Oh where are the trivial joys? Harmless, convivial joys?
Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?

Because, heaven knows, that I've always wanted brother to kill brother over me. Well, there were those twins in high school that I wouldn't minded fighting over me, but I digress... Listening to these lyrics made me wonder--what are the modern "simple joys of maidenhood"? Fear of online dating? Speed dating? The bar scene? PSAs about STDs? Bridesmaid dresses?

Still searching for answers...